Nurture - December 30, 2019

10 Things to Let Go Of In 2020

Generally speaking, most people give up on their New Year’s resolutions somewhere between mid-January or mid-February. This is often due to the fact that people view a resolution as one big thing to tackle, perhaps with the subconscious belief that only once that goal is reached will they be happy, complete people. 

While setting resolutions to improve some aspect of yourself or your life is never a bad thing, no matter the month of the year, letting go of old habits, things, or beliefs can be an incredibly powerful agent of change. To make room for the great things you want and deserve out of life, let this list inspire you to release that which no longer serves you. 

 

Old clothes. 

The phrase “new year, new me,” usually implies a bigger and better version of yourself, decked out in clothing that makes you look and feel great. But that’s just part of it. By releasing old, outdated outfits and accessories, you can create change by literally making room for new things to enter your closet if that’s what we want. Assess your wardrobe, bag up what you don’t use, and donate those items to someone who may find more value in them. 

Anything that needs to be purged. 

Why wait for spring to start cleaning? In addition to old clothes, donate anything that you’re better off parting ways with before you step into a new year. This will help signify a fresh start that’s full of possibilities in 2020. This purging philosophy can apply to your home, car, workspace, anywhere that tends to accumulate clutter and the stale energy that comes with it. 

Assumptions. 

Assumptions are easy to make because we tend to see everything from our point of view, but when we do so, we only get half the story. Rather than assume, Don Miguel Ruiz, author of The Four Agreements, encourages us to ask questions instead. This way, we have all the information we need to reach conclusions based on reality. We may still end up disappointed with the answers we get, but in asking, we can empower ourselves and save our minds and our hearts precious time.  

Social media accounts you don’t love. 

Find yourself mindlessly scrolling through a large chunk of your Instagram feed? Now’s a good time to be liberal with that “unfollow” button. This may seem like a minor change to make, but according to Digital Information World, the average person spends nearly two and a half hours a day on social media and messaging apps. The images and language that we see during this precious time make an impact on our overall wellbeing. If something isn’t making you happy, or worse, it is making you feel bad about yourself, leave that page in 2019 and find new accounts that leave you feeling inspired and encouraged in 2020. 

Limiting beliefs about money. 

Shifting old beliefs about money is much easier said than done, not to mention it will look different for everyone. Regardless of your financial situation, limiting your beliefs about what you think you deserve monetarily will only hold you back. One way to start shifting the monologue around money is to stop with the self-deprecating jokes about being broke—treat your relationship with money the way you would your partner or friend, with care and respect. 

Limiting beliefs about anything, really.

Are you noticing a theme? So often, it seems like we don’t have enough, and when we focus on what we don’t have, it makes it easy to overlook the opportunities that surround us. Not sure how to change your beliefs? Reciting a mantra is a good place to start. One that is particularly helpful is this: “There is enough (insert thing you hope for more of, like time, work, money, or love.) I am capable of doing it, and I am worthy of receiving it.” 

The idea that you don’t have enough time for yourself. 

Between work, school, family, and everything else that takes up time in your day, it may be easy to dismiss much-needed time for yourself as extravagant, or even impossible. While you need to prioritize certain things in your life (hitting that deadline, dropping off the kids, paying your bills, etc.), the belief that you don’t have enough time for yourself can end up costing you more in the long run. In fact, the Greater Good Science Center at Berkeley University states that rest has been scientifically proven to increase productivity, reduce stress, and make us physically healthier. All of which can help you reach your goals and enjoy your life daily. 

Resentments.

There’s a great, albeit cliché, statement about resentments: resentments are like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. The lesson? You only hold yourself back when you cling to resentments. They keep you stuck and waste your time, so it’s best to work through them and keep moving forward. Sometimes, you can talk to the person you’re resentful of and find clarity, other times, it’s just up to you to let go and move on. Whatever it looks like for you, invest in your happiness by letting go of old resentments, be that by writing down your anger and burning the page, or working through your trauma with the help of a professional therapist.  

Unrealistic fantasies.

This may take some time to achieve, and honestly, it may be a practice you carry well into the new year. But holding on to unrealistic fantasies usually involves some level of holding on to the past and clinging to situations in which you have no real control. If you’re realizing that an external force is responsible for your happiness, it’s probably not healthy, and should be reevaluated. 

A too-strict regimen.

The American Psychiatric Association states that one way to keep a resolution is to start small. If you find yourself working so hard that you’re feeling burnt out or stressed about reaching your goal, loosen up your regimen, set a manageable goal until it’s become a habit, and slowly work your way up. Because positive change is meant to make you feel great about yourself and trusting yourself enough to accomplish a goal starts with small steps. 

Letting go of things, including old habits, can be scary, and may even feel like grief in a lot of ways. When striving for change, the important thing to remember is that you steer this ship, you have the choice to believe something different, and you deserve all the good that comes with letting go and receiving more. 

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